Things Organic Students Hate

There are certain things that Organic Chemistry I students, starry-eyed and naive that they are, strongly dislike about organic chemistry. Sometimes it’s simply the way things are named. Other times it’s things that, according to our Gen Chem books, shouldn’t exist. No matter what they are, it takes us quite a long time to get over cringing every time we see them. What are these horrible things? Well, I’m glad you asked.

Eclipsed Conformations

1668px-Eclipsed_Conformation.svg

Steric and torsional strain, oh my!

ΔΔG

Don’t even make me get into it.

Carbocations

200px-Methyl_cation.svg

That’s a—you put a charge on a carbon? Whyyy??

Carbanions

651px-Carbanion_Structural_Formulae_V.1.svg

No please make it stop no more

Halonium Ions

800px-Cyclopentene-bromonium-3D-balls

Never mind! I want the carbanion back. That’s a bromine atom with two bonds and a positive formal charge. Why does that even happen?

Methylenecyclohexane

Methylenecyclohexane

Students: How do you name this?

TA: Oh, it’s easy. Use your alkene naming rules.

Students: ??? ????? ?????

Cyclononene

233px-Beta-Caryophyllen.svg

Just trying to draw that by hand…

These are just a few of the things that we, as organic n00bs, very much dislike. These will likely go the direction of expanded octets, noble gas compounds, molecular orbital theory and half-filled transition metal shells, and, by this time next semester, we won’t bat an eyelash. Still, at the moment… it’s painful.

[Doing Things] (A Day in the Life)

[Hanging out in the boys’ room after a day of running around campus]

Bill: [is absent]

Fritz: [cat noises] [playing Majora’s Mask]

Finn: [cooking] [on the computer]

Junhi: [swearing] [asking for guidance from RNGesus]

June: [blogging] [writing Apocalypse, Pls fanfiction]

I Feel A Bond Forming

So, Fritz, Sapphire, Finn and I went to dinner at Chik-fil-a tonight as a reward for not completely putting off all of our studying. While there, conversation turned to the characteristics of our typical relationships (romantic and otherwise), and Sapphire and I started making chemistry jokes. These beautifully spawned analogies, borne of exhaustion and a downright lack of cares, were dubbed internet worthy. I present them to you now.


Fritz: Fritz is like fluorine: dangerous when left to his own devices, but a productive member of society when properly socialized.

Finn: Finn is like a halogen. Most of his relationships are polarized, with Finn being more sensitive than the other member. He needs to find someone of equal emotional strength to form a non-polar bond with.

Sapphire: Sapphire’s relationship with Beau is like a bromonium ion: inharmonious with logic, but still a natural phenomenon. (Read: It doesn’t make logical sense, but it still is.)

June: When it comes to relationships proper, June is like Xenon; she is capable of forming a multitude of transient bonds, but mostly ends up by herself in the end.


There you have it, folks. I’m not sure which is sadder: the reality of most of our interpersonal skills, or the fact that we spent time at dinner making chemistry jokes. Oh well, as unsocialized and nerdy as we may be, we still get along well with each other. Doesn’t make sense? Yeah, we know. Whatever, logic. We do what we want.

The Foreign Languages Department

There are exactly two places on campus, outside of the residence halls, that I feel completely at home. The first is in Chem Recitation. The second is in the office of the foreign languages department.

There’s something about being here that I love intensely; I walk in and instantly feel happier. I think it’s because this is the only place on campus where you can easily find someone who is studying the language you’re studying, or who is studying a completely different language. I also like hearing all of the professors speak in their languages—it’s always really cool to hear people conversing in Chinese or German or French.

Of course, it could just be because of this awesome Japanese bulletin board.

image

In Japanese Class

先生:はい、どうぞ。

学生:「先生はいい先生です。」

先生:そうか?ありがとうー

学生:先生はだめな先生です。(エッヘン〜)

先生:そう?![runs across room, points, yells] 学生はだめな学生です!だめ!

クラス:「ゲラゲラ」


Japanese Professor: Right, go on, then.

Japanese Student: “Teacher is a good teacher.”

Professor: Oh, is that so? Thank—

Student: Teacher is a bad teacher. (Heh heh~)

Teacher: Really?! [runs across room, points, yells] Student is a bad student! Bad!!

Class: [loud laughter]


If you speak fluent Japanese, please don’t kill me… 私は日本語102の学生です。