Elevator Etiquette: A Primer

Concerning Deciding Whether to Take the Elevator:

1) Are you wearing a backpack or otherwise encumbered by something heavy or awkward?

If yes, see two.

If no, see three.

2) Is the elevator especially full?

If yes and encumbered, see B.

Otherwise, see three.

3) Are you trying to get to one of the highest floors? (Floors 6-8 in an eight-floor building.)

If yes, see A.

Otherwise, see four.

4) Are you trying to get to one of the lowest floors? (2-3)

If encumbered, see A.

Otherwise, see C.

—-

A: Get on the elevator.

B: Wait for another one.

C: Take the stairs.

A Sendoff for Sherly

Today marks an important day for Sherly: She is officially a college student. While we are very proud of her, not to mention happy for her, all of us (her friends at home) already miss her dearly.

We knew they were coming, but that didn’t make the goodbyes any easier.

Sherly, if you manage to find the time to read this, Finn, Scout and I (and probably the others, too) would like to say something to you:

(To shamelessly quote phrases that Sherly and Finn, in that order, wrote for Apocalypse, Pls:)

Though this may be the end of times, it’s certainly not the end of us. We’re family, and family stays family forever.

Study hard, have fun, make friends, and be a boss. Just remember, we’re always here for you.